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Religion had always been her thing, not mine. No, my thoughts were on the girl sitting towards the back of the church. She had her hands folded demurely in her lap, a solemn little frown on her face. She was fair-haired and skinned, a small smattering of freckles danced across the bridge of her nose. Okay, I amended, her breasts were too big to consider her a girl, but she was young. I wondered why she was here, I had certainly never seen her before. A relative on my wife’s side? Somehow I didn’t think so. I wiggled on the uncomfortable pew, trying to show the proper amount of grief during the key points in the sermon. The truth was, I felt a bitter detachment from it all. Everyone thought my wife had died in a car accident on the way to church, and I was content to let everyone keep on thinking that. But in reality church was the last thing on my wife’s mind that day. No, Mary was going past the church to the little suburb where her lover lived. Yes, my wife had been unfaithful to. Still with a huge grin on his face, he drove off to the dry cleaners. “Hey Nick, is that time of year again?” the dry cleaner, Doris, greet him. “Yeah, it seems to be coming quicker and quicker every year Doris.” He smiled handing the suit over. “You aren’t kidding. I remember when you were going to see Santa with your mom and sister. Now you’re playing Santa for the kiddies.” Doris laughed. “God Doris, you’re making me feel old!” he chuckled. “YOU feel old?! How do you think I feel?” She laughed as she handed him his ticket. “Thanks, Doris.” He smiled and took the ticket. Nick went to the barbers for a trim and shave, before picking the suit back up from Doris, and going home to try his beard and freshly cleaned suit on. Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, he straightened his snow white beard and hat with hair. He walked into the bedroom in his CK boxers. Picking up the prosthetic rubber belly from the bed, he strapped it across his toned stomach. He stood in front of the full.
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